Episode 36: Todd the Romantic

Todd was wrong about the idea of dressing up like your date. It’s childish (and sure, romantic if you want to call it that, Todd). But I need to discuss something else, and that is the fish. Tonight was fish & chips night.

I’m not sure how I gave it two sombreros, because it was one of the worst things I have eaten there. Simply terrible. The breading was too hard, and inside of the breading, when you bite in to the fish, some greasy, watery liquid came out, like some nightmarish mini pinata of disgusting.

You may notice that some of us wear Pete’s Fish & Chips shirts sometimes. They are some fish & chips shops in PHX area that our friends, The Adams, are associated with. Pete’s is a very simple place with very simple fried fish done RIGHT. We were worried that Cinco de Mayo might give it a run for its money. Pete’s money is safe right where it is, and nobody is running after it. At least not in this neighborhood.

So, in summary, Cinco does many things well, but fish & chips is NOT one of them. Todd was the only one who got it right (the rating, not the idea of dressing up like your date). I wish I had rated the fish one measly sombrero. BLECHHH.

Tonight’s menu: the number 36 – fish & chips.

Episode 35: Just Above the Knee

First off, apologies to the gentleman with the abnormally elongated body part for exploiting and outing you to the 40-80 people who will watch this video. I dearly hope this is never brought to your attention. I also hope that you have found a medical solution to your condition, or at least some peace with the way the good Lord made you. It’s just that we’re so curious how you do certain things like put your pants on, ride a bike, or sit on a toilet.

It’s not our proudest topic of conversation, but we’re dudes. We’re fascinated by the abnormalities of the human anatomy.

If you’re out there Mr. Little, please let us know how you’re doing.

Tonight’s menu: the number 35 – pastrami (combo optional).

Episode 34: Devin’s Tone

Chaz and I kept some distance when we first met way back in the day, but we have had a pretty civil relationship since then. At least I think we have. (Indeed we have, my dear friend. -Chaz)

For a while Todd and I kept a secret from the others, and that built a bond. We kept getting large salsas. At first we didn’t ask for them, they just gave us large cups. No idea why. Then we asked for them after they stopped coming automatically. But we pretended that we were doing some trick that Dave and Chaz didn’t know. Tee hee.

But Dave… for some reason Dave pushes my buttons at times. We get along quite well and have rarely had any instances where we were mad for more than about 30 seconds. But we have different tastes in music and TV shows sometimes, girls usually and sports teams almost ALWAYS. But we really do agree to disagree and are totally fine within seconds. I think I call him David because of Dave Letterman’s mom. Anytime Dave (Letterman) makes some joke at her expense, she always says “Oh, David!” So yeah, that’s part of where my tone comes from.

Oh, and that rice? That rice is horrible. Their regular rice is OK, but the special red rice? Never, ever, EVER have anything with the “special rice” at Cinco.

Tonight’s menu: the number 34 – arroz con camaron.

Episode 32: Hurting My Feelings

Believe it or not, this was actually a monumental menu item for us. You see the menu just reads “32. ONION RING”. For months we’ve been asking ourselves,”Could it really be just one big gigantic onion ring?” Well sadly it was a bag of many rings, but it was definitely not sad for my taste buds. Yes, I gave it a 5. I know, Cinco de Mayo actually did something right again. They make great onions rings. Then again, how hard is it to screw that up?

Btw, those aren’t repeated cuts. Dave really has a really hard time eating onion rings.

Tonight’s menu: the number 32 – onion ring.